Estimated Reading Time: 20 minutes

Relationship Edition

Megan and Tim Roeckel | Married

Megan: 

1. Marriage isn’t 50/50. Don’t expect it to be. Expect 70/30. You’ll always feel like you’re doing more, but so will they. You do things for them that they don’t notice and vice versa. If you feel like you’re doing 70%, they probably do as well.
2.  Don’t date or marry someone based on potential. Look at them for who they are and how they treat you today and decide if that’s something you are willing to accept forever. Sometimes people really do change, but not always. Don’t bank on it.
3.  Find that one super annoying thing your person does that they probably can’t change (how they chew, snore, they don’t like soup) and decide if it’s something you can put up with forever.
4. Love yourself first. Travel alone. Get some hobbies. It’s not a joke that you’re more lovable when you love yourself. And don’t give up those pieces when you do find someone

Tim:

• Find someone who makes you more comfortable in their presence than you do when you’re alone.

Gia Ellis | Open Relationship

• A big thing for me is if the relationship is real and you actually love that person, then never throw disrespect on their name. Sure you can roast them and have banter but when speaking about your partner to someone else or speaking directly to them, absolutely no insults or low blows

Donna Mathew and Ruben Varghese  | Engaged

Donna:

1. Don’t be a temporary person because you aren’t trying to be in a temporary relationship. Be with someone who wants to be permanent with you, which makes the relationship permanent. 
2. Don’t listen to listen, listen to understand. Communication is key but under communication is active listening. Listening to your partner and understanding their issues, problems, feelings etc. 
3. It’s not, I am sorry you feel that way, instead, let’s say, I am sorry I made you feel that way! It doesn’t matter if you think what you said isn’t hurtful, at the end of the day your partner told you it was. So say sorry you made your partner feel a certain type of way of your words. 
4. You aren’t just each other’s bf/gf. You are each other’s teachers, to teach each other, each other’s best friends to talk nonstop, each other’s cheerleaders to motivate each other. Continue to be more than just one role 
5. You shouldn’t be chained in a relationship. You should be able to do what you want for your career, go out with people you want, hang out with anyone, etc. the only condition is that, you communicate to your partner and whatever choices you make it’s because your partner trusts you and you know right from wrong. 

Ruben:

1. Choose people who choose you 
2. Don’t go to sleep angry. Life is too short to be angry at things that in 5-10 years won’t even matter.
3. Be with someone who is your best friend
4. Be with someone who motivates you in life 
5. There are 10 arguments in life. 2 of them I’m allowed to win but the other 8 Donna will always win haha. Happy (future wife) happy life. 

Noel John | Relationship

• It’s gonna sound crazy to kids nowadays. Date seriously. Date to marry not just fool around. If you ain’t dating to marry, you’re dating for heartbreak. Don’t let social media and today’s world tell you otherwise. Settling down and finding a partner for life is some of the most beautiful shit ever. There’s nothing like having another individual intertwined with your life, always in your corner. And once again it sounds crazy, but that may mean not dating in HS. Not dating in early college. But you just wasting your time and the other person’s when you are not serious. Obv shit happens and “serious” people may break up too. But go into relationships thinking about permanency, because if you’re not, then what are you doing really?

Zainab and Mike Cohen | Married

Zainab: be empathetic and grow with your partner💕 communicate everything and be patient with one another 

Mike: Give as much, or more, as you receive. Love should be fair

Rahul Nair | Relationship 

• My advice is, to be honest, and to be yourself. If you fake to be someone you’re not, nothing will ever work. People will love you for you and you will be surprised at who will find your authentic self to be attractive. This advice applies to both singles and people in relationships. Have empathy as well.

Daksha Patel | Married

• Listen to your partner and don’t pass judgment 
• Don’t make decisions and say things  in anger … walk away calm yourself down and gather your thoughts and then speak 
• Put yourself in your partner’s shoes to see what or why they are thinking or saying and not seeing eye to eye with you … see their perspective

Vivek Parikh and Archie Naik  | Engaged

Vivek: 

Many older couples say after a while the spark goes away or keeping that same affection goes away or fights happen etc along those lines.. and I feel they say that because they have unresolved issues within themselves which they wish they can solve or it’s too late to solve now. And I was thinking about how in our life I want us to not feel that way and always remember THIS time in our lives ( of us waiting to get married) but also ALWAYS being respectful of EACH other. This includes things like preferences, beliefs, and values. Many of those fights happen because that respect isn’t put in place either but for us, I know as long we continually respect, care, listen and understand each other as a team this bond will only grow stronger 💛

Archie: 

One thing people don’t tell you is that no matter how amazing your partner is, relationships are a lot of work. And it’s going to be difficult after the initial phase of finding similarities and cute things. You’re never going to see eye to eye on everything so the least you can do is ensure the person is respectful from the start and that you’re able to do everything and anything to make it work. Make sure they are going to be worth fighting for. And worth the differences and arguments. 😊

Navi Kalhar | Married 

• Honestly, for me, learn to recognize when you need space and be verbal about it. And be open if your partner asks for space. Space doesn’t necessarily mean that you need a “break” from the relationship. According to my, it’s knowing that you both are different people and that your lives do not revolve around one another. Relationships become toxic when we get used to one another.

Anupriya Sajeev | Married

• I think when we talk about relationships, then first we have to replace the words adjustment and sacrifice with the term “understanding”. Don’t force yourself to love someone. Let it happen naturally. Don’t jump into a decision. Just be patient.. spend time together without trying to impress each other. Then only you can understand the other person the way he/she actually is.
• When things happen in a natural way then only u can experience the magical part in a relationship. So your mind will be ready to accept the other person the way they are. Then you don’t wanna adjust or sacrifice anything. You don’t wanna change the other one. No ego clash.. Pure love works.
• Loving someone is actually a process ❤️😇 it will take time..but it’s really a beautiful thing to experience!

Tanuja Meeks | Married

• The best relationship advice is Communication! Don’t expect that the person in your life knows what you are thinking and/or feeling. Jeff always says to me, men are big dumb animals. Tell them what you think or feel or need. Relationships are working, if it’s important to you then put in the work.  

Anonymous | Relationship

• Oooh.. this is practical but someone once told me that you should be wary of dating  someone with bad credit because that likely means they are not responsible and such 

Sara Jacobs | Married

• Be true to yourself and the other person. Vice versa.  TRUST IS MOST IMPORTANT!!! Without that, what’s a relationship…honesty too!

Zoya A. | Married

• Never go to sleep on a bad note. You don’t necessarily have to resolve the issue right then and there, but at least address the situation and assure each other that you will both work towards finding a common understanding on the matter tomorrow or in the near future. It significantly reduces anxiety and the chances of the situation escalating. It creates a healthy means of communication which truly becomes the foundation of a healthy relationship. 
• Being married to a therapist definitely helps too!😂

Shiza Khan | Relationship

• Definitely love each other’s love languages 

Rohan Kapoor and Sophy M. | Relationship

Rohan: 

I’ve learned from my relationships that the only thing that will make it work is compromise. Don’t state what you both want, think about solutions that are in the middle, not what either would be most happy with.

Sophy: 

Make sure to set aside some time to check in on your relationship with each other every so often. Life gets crazy and we tend to lose sight of those that we love because of those distractions. This time is meant to evaluate the relationship, see what’s working, what’s not, and to help with open communication. To practice vulnerability and to grow comfortable with it. When you don’t, there will come a time of you will hide some unresolved feelings that will affect that relationship. 

Summing it up in a quote, every relationship is a three-person party: you, your partner, and the actual relationship.

Alyssa Marie | Relationship

• Always be honest, talk things out in a clear and calm manner, don’t be afraid to ask what you want/need from your partner, listen to your partner and vice versa, and repeat back to make sure you both understand what’s being communicated, you can talk all you want, but if you don’t understand then the  talking is pointless, tell/show each other that you love each other (you don’t have to buy something, there are so many ways for both of you to show your love and support), don’t be afraid of doing things alone, don’t neglect friends when you are in a relationship

Zainab Asif Joyo | Married

• I read somewhere; a failing relationship involves three factors: the first partner, the second partner, and an ego
• When making decisions, such as planning a wedding or buying things for the house, rely on your partner for support instead of assuming all responsibility. they will have things they care about and you will have things you care about. divide and conquer are so important, the other person is meant to be there to help you in every situation.

Angad Gill and Éowyn McClelland | Relationship

• “My Partner and I have been together for 6 years, and we both feel that the best relationship advice we can give is to focus on good communication skills, honesty, and transparency.
• Every time we’ve ever had tension, arguments, or worried about each other in our relationship, the source of that contention was often miscommunication or misunderstanding. The most common thing we used to de-escalate our stress was communicating our feelings and being open with one another. Specifically taking turns listening to the other person to understand and learn.
• When we learn about our partners and process their perspectives from our own, we can better understand what we can do to help our partners or find things that they do that help us. 
• While good communication can’t save or keep a relationship that isn’t meant to be. Any relationship without good communication won’t be healthy and likely won’t last for long.”

Sonya Islam | Married

Hi you! 

Are you single? GOOD. Are you scared of being single? Don’t think like that. Step back. Take a deep breath. This is what you’re missing in your life. YOU. Have you been single for a while? Do you know what you like and dislike? Have you been on dates to figure that out? If you have, cool. If you haven’t, that’s fine too. I recommend going on dates, figuring out what you like in a person and what you don’t. Even if the date doesn’t go anywhere, you met someone new. It’s good to be certain of your wants and needs. In the meantime, Empower you. Enjoy going on dates, alone. Enjoy your own company. Love comes when you least expect it. The person can not be your type at all. But people aren’t ‘types’ they are individuals with certain characteristics that either give you red flags or green lights. If you see you can go a whole 24 hours with this person without getting annoyed, this is it. A theme park would be the best date place to figure that out.

BUT when you are flourishing on your own, doing you, God says here you go, this is the person your life needs. Sometimes it’s not as easy but trust me, looking for love feels so forced. You’re on a path looking for someone with who you can connect with. Why bother? Let that person come to you. When a person is thriving, living their best life, boom. That’s when it happens. 

Rameet Kahlon | Married 

• I would say the best is to be open and honest with each other and be able to communicate. Without communication, you wouldn’t be able to have an honest relationship. 

Trisha Patel Torres | Married

Relationship advice

• Consistent and open communication (very cliche but very true)
• Accept and allow one another’s independence 
• Embrace your differences to accept change 
• Schedule couple time
• Explore with each other

Amber Kang| Relationship

• Hmmm I think my best advice would be to always be transparent with your partner and be willing to hear an opposing opinion. As people we can get defensive but it’s important to keep an open mind to other perspectives and help each other understand one another. 
• Also, encouraging growth is essential in a healthy relationship. It’s so important to be supportive of trying new things or listening to new ideas. 

Kristina Patel | Married

• It’s simple: Communicate, that’s my best advice 🙂 

Nirav Patel and Avani Patel | Engaged

• Our best advice is pretty cliche but something that cannot be overstated; communication is always key. A strong relationship revolves around talking things through regardless of how crazy circumstances get. Even if something seems minute in the moment, openly sharing feelings can make a big impact down the road. Encourage and celebrate, through words and actions, each other’s wins and be supportive through the losses and lessons learned along the way. Rain or shine, talk it through!

Jennifer Orellana | Relationship

• My best relationship advice would be to listen to your partner and know how he/she is feeling. I believe that plays a major role in a relationship because it can build trust and it will let your partner know they aren’t alone.

Seerat Jhajj | Relationship

• I would say good and lasting relationships require a lot of open communication with yourself and your partner, maintaining individual identities while showing up for the other in ways that work for them.

Sana Khan | Married

• My advice for singles is to “know who you are and who you want to be before you get into a relationship. Be comfortable being alone because a significant other should not define you, your happiness, or be your only source of entertainment. The right person should complement your life, not fill it.”
• And for those in relationships, “it’s 100% possible to keep the magic and spark years down the road. Even after kids. Your significant other can still give you butterflies and make your world glow 2 kids and 20 pounds later. But you have to put in the work. It’s not 50/50. It’s 100/100 every day. Some days it’s even 100/110. But never put less than your all into the love of your life. They deserve the best of you.”

Nora Mohamed | Relationship

• Make life fun. Come up with unique games between you two that are entertaining. For example, we have a game called obscure memories; where we try to think of our most obscure memory we share together and see who can top who. Keeps things light and fun. Good luck xoxo

Harsha Raveendran| Married

• The best advice I can give to any single is to be open and to give each other space.

Johanna | Relationship

• I’d have to say that the best advice I can give is finding happiness with ourselves and not depending on someone to come make us happy. And also maybe that when we focus on what we don’t have we attract more of that. It’s best to be grateful for what we do have.

Karen Bradshaw and Joseph Jewett | Relationship

• My boyfriend had a great answer: “Treat your partner with love. We all have different perspectives, and the greatest advantage of a two-person relationship is that they have your best interest at heart. When your perspective fails, your partner can guide you back on course, and vice versa. This can be a difficult interaction, but if you both know that it always comes from a place of love, then you know you always have someone who will be your cheerleader when you’re kicking butt, and your conscience when you’re failing to be who you want.” I would agree with that. 🙂 I would also add that the little things make a huge difference. Treat your partner with their favorite foods or watch a movie they really enjoy. Going out of your way to make them happy on their own terms makes a huge difference.

Ashley Violet Hester | Married

• My advice would be to just respect each other’s personal space and just commit not cheating or anything because in my marriage there will be no divorce… A murder.. maybe.. but a divorce, it’s not possible.. till death do us part. So the only thing that would separate me and my hubby would be death!! And even then I wouldn’t remarry. I just couldn’t imagine life after death without my soul mate and those are my beliefs. I just know that I have to carry him all the way to heaven with me and beyond and that’s that!
• So have a lot of faith in your marriage.. use your higher power THROUGHOUT
• And never ever give up on one another God made you one so for eternity you shall be one through the union of marriage

Selina | Relationship

• I believe being able to communicate, being honest, and having a sense of autonomy is important in a relationship. I realized couples tend to just mesh and merge into one, sometimes neglecting their own wants and experiences. Having the space to “do you” and continue to nurture your own individuality is invaluable for both partners. The relationship will be stronger, more reassuring, and continue to grow. 💙

Vidya Nijjar | Married

Relationship Advice:

• Don’t rush into anything
• Always trust your gut
• You won’t always be in the honeymoon stage so make sure that you really like the person enough beyond just the physical attraction!
• Find someone who challenges you to be a better version of yourself while also accepting and loving you for exactly who you are!
• Don’t have to have similar interests or hobbies but should align in what you want for your future together (where to live, marriage, kids, etc)

Tiffany L. | Engaged

• Never use ending the relationship as a weapon. It creates distance and puts the idea of being single in your partner’s head.

Lauren Ruvo | Married

• Before you get into a relationship, make sure you love yourself. Take time to get to know who you are and learn to honor your flaws and every ounce of yourself that makes you, YOU. You can’t expect someone to love you if you don’t love yourself first. 

Sangita Patel| Married

• My best advice would be “don’t do it”. Relationships, marriage is exhausting. It’s not for everyone, though life, society says you grow up and get married and have kids….

Katie Walker | Married

• Honestly, my biggest advice is to have the hard conversations, even if you think they’re going to be uncomfortable or start a fight. Having open communication with your partner is the most important thing

Deepak Moosad | Married

• When you’re asked the question is the glass half full or half empty. Some may answer half full and others half-empty…. Then the sneaky ones will say always full half water and half air….. relationship is kind of like this. It’s what you make of it….. but whatever it has to create a balance that works for you. The only thing you can control in this balancing formula is yourself. So respect yourself and love yourself. By doing this you will know who you are and what you want. This will allow you to be a better partner, better listener, and a better contributor to a relationship.

Jayant Totlani and Aisha Haque | Relationship 

• Compatibility is most important. Wanting the same things and having the same values are critical because it means you don’t have to change yourself to be with that person. Unfortunately, it also means that some relationships are doomed from the start.

Yasmine Mahida | Married

• My advice is to work on yourself and be independent and confident in yourself before you think about going into a relationship. When you’re in a relationship you have to love/support/respect someone else and if you don’t have that for yourself you definitely can’t for someone else. There’s a line – you can’t pour from an empty cup-and that is a relationship.

Sara Jacob | Married

• ​​But I can say: Be true to yourself and the other person. Vice versa.  TRUST IS MOST IMPORTANT!!! Without that, what’s a relationship…honesty too.